Life as I know it...

10:56 pm

Hey Hey Hey. Today, I woke up around 11, and watched Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire with Michael and his mom, Laverene. Around 5:30 or so, Michael and I went to AppleBees for Dinner where I cheated on my diet a little and have "normal" food (it was great). After that, we went to see the 7 o' clock showing "The Hills Have Eyes" which, by the way, is a really messed up movie! Anyway...

School starts back up on Monday (yippy...not!). I am not looking forward to it at all. The sooner it starts back up though, the sooner summer comes around.
**Michael leaves for Austrailia on like May 14th or something. It's going to be miserable for me because he'll be away for about a month. That's the longest he and I have been away from each other. It's gonna' be hard, but hopefully, I'll be able to get through it okay.

I guess that's everything for now. I guess i'm gonna' end this and head off to bed (I'm beginning to get a little sleepy). :op

ps: I bought The Beach Boys Pet Sounds this week on Ebay for $5. I can't stop listening to it (Michael doesn't like them very much but Pet Sounds is my favorite album!)

Current Mood: sleepy

09:45 pm

Hey Hey Hey! American Idol's about to come off--it's beginning to get better. Kellie Pickler is SO funny! My favorite though is Chris Daughtry. Hmm... Other than that...

Spring Break is going on right now... Haven't had much time to enjoy it because i've been sick. :op Maybe things willl start to pick up. :o)

Current Mood: sick

11:45 am - Val

This Morning, I went downstairs to visit with Val for a couple minutes and I noticed something--he wasn't moving. :o( Val died this morning. What am I suppose to do now? I can't just go out and get a new Val--he was one of a kind. The way he use to swim around in his bowl--it was almost like poetry. Now, he's gone.

Current Mood: sad

03:15 pm

Hey Guys. How's it going? I just finished up some homework and thought i'd drop a line. :op Not much has been happening with me this past week or so. 
I went to a funeral with Michael and his family (his Aunt Mabel passed away), which made me sad. Funerals make me sad. I never had the chance to meet her though I still felt terrible. The way everyone spoke of her, she sounded like the ideal elderly woman--the kind I hope to be like when i'm up there in age. Here's what I want to me like when I'm 70 years old:
      
             I want to have a little house, with a fenced in yard. I want to knit socks for all my grandchildren. I want to have the church youth group come over to do yard work in the fall and i'll bake lotz and lotz of cookies for them. I want to have long white hair, and donate to goodwill all my clothes. I want to have a husband who give the grandkids money everytime he seens them and tells stories from his past. on Christmas eve, the whole family will come over for a gigantic ham and turkey dinner. I'll make the turkey and the worlds best stuffing. Then, afterwards, we'll gather in the living room and open gifts.

It's a little more in depth than that, but that should give you some idea of how I want to be. I guess you could say June Chapman will be my modeling older woman (cept I won't write profound articles and journals). :op

Current Mood: contemplative

02:09 pm - "Workin' hard for the money..."

Hey guyz, got bored here at work and thought I would drop a short line about how much I hate this damn office... Why you ask???

1) The computers are slow as krap
2) All they do around here is complain about how other employees don't work. One guy comes to mind when I say this. He pisses me off so much because he'll make the work studies do whatever it is that he doesn't wanna' do (we're considered "cheap laborers" for a reason). It was the same way last semester, the other other office I worked in. I complain too, don't get me wrong, but this is rediculous. All this guy does is sit around at his computer and either shop on Ebay or play backgammon (or however it's spelt).... Then, he actually has the gull to complain about how someone "doesn't do their job" or how he doesn't like most work studies because they don't do anything. WE ONLY GET PAID $5.15 FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! AND! AND WE'RE BLOODY FULL TIME STUDENTS, THEREFORE WE HAVE HOMEWORK! It's not like I sit around and eat food and ignore my employers whenever i'm asked to do something. I do whatever is asked of me. He just waves them off like it's nothing, and continues being a lazy jerk. 66 99 He makes me wanna' rip of his arm and beat him with it till' he's unconscious. Anyway. now that I got that off my mind, I feel much better. :op

I guess I'll end this for now.... See ya!

Current Mood: pissed off

11:45 am - Today...

Today's been so dead. I got up at 730 and had to get to class by 930 (waking up michael is one of the most difficult tasks known to man!). I have to take my mom on some errans after work and then Michael's gotta' get his haircut. After that, we can go home. :o) I also don't feel very well, i've been kinda' sick lately. Nothing major; just the annoying head cold.

What more is there to say? That's my day!

Current Mood: hungry

02:18 pm - Today...

*Sigh* Today's just dragged along for the most part. I mean, I woke up at 730, and come to abrose's class around 900; well, he didn't make it to class so I got out after like 5 minutes. CMM 103, I had to give a speech (I did it on Personality Disorders). Anyway... Other than that, my day's been pretty boring. To be honest, I'm feeling a little aggrevated today. I just don't wanna' do anything today.

I'm kinda' not getting along so well with my mom either. The only time she really calls me is if she needs something. I never really noticed it until today but she manipulates me, and it's getting on my nerves. I don't see how she's any better than my dad. It makes me not wanna' come and see her or anything. She's suppose to be the adult... Yet i'm the one who has to take care of her. It's so annoying.

I've talked to my advisor, sarah, about this and she told me that I need to let my mom take care of herself. She's an adult and if she doesn't wanna' do what she needs to take care of herself, then I shouldn't worry about it. I mean, she lives so close to wendys and yet she'll call me and have me bring them something. She expects me to do anything for her and yet, Brandon (my brotheR), can just laze around the house and stay drunk.


I'm ready to just knock em' outa' my life. I'm doing what I need to take care of myself, yet I have more stress on my shoulders than what I should. I'm suppose to take care of myself, do well in college, and take care of my mom. I can't do it. I'm just one person.

I honestly think in doing all this shit for my mom, I may be slowly losing my Michael. I know he doesn't really like doing all this stuff for my family because he's got more homework than anyone I know and he's gotta' focus on that. He's been there for me so much with all that's going on in my life, but there's only so much a guy can handle before just losing it. I don't wanna' lose him over something like this. He's my soul mate; the love of my life. I can't imagine my life without him.

Anyway, now that i've spoken what's on my mind, I think I can go home less annoyed and depressed. thanks for listening! :o)

Current Mood: aggravated

11:28 am - life as I know it...

Hey guyz. Thought I'd drop a line just to tell ya'
what's going on in my life right now..

Well, Classes are just swell--i've gotta' give a speech this friday on personality disorder, and i'm not exactly happy about the whole situation (i'm sure i'll get by just fine though).. What else?
Michael and I kinda' had a spat last night (it was pretty big but i'm not going into big detail about it). I wouldn't exactly say that we fight alot but we do have out disagreements. I think Noah Calhoone said it well:

"Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing." This is what our relationship is kinda' like... I realize that I'm not a very nice person to be around 24/7 and he's tolerated me for nearly 2 years (that's a record). I've never had anyone really accept me for who I am--it's a great feeling, believe me. I mean, of course he isn't really into my family very much but he still loves me in spite of all that. Not to mention, his family and I get along great. I talk to Laverene (michael's mom) about alot going on in my life. But it's different than my mom--really, it is. My mom is like my best friend. I tell my mom absolutly everything--EVERYTHING. Laverene, is that the mom I never really had growing up. She gives me boundaries. I know there are some things i'm just not suppose to talk about with her. I like that. I like having that relationship with someone. I trust her. Anyway,

What else is going on?? *blah* not much really. I've been keeping up with American Idol. Last night, though, I didn't watch all of it for two reasons..
1** Because I already saw my chick, Kelly Pickler, and i'm not really into the other girlies right now.
2** Because I wanted to watch Monk with Michael and he's got the first two seasons on DVD, so we watched some of
Season 2.

I'm also keeping up with my man House, and of course, 24. Not very many people I know watch 24 but believe me, it's an awesome drama. I love Kiefer Sutherland in it.

Lastly, I'm also trying to read all the Harry Potter books before next year (well, all the ones that are out as of right now). I deffinently wanna' be finished with the 5th book before the next movie because it's the next one coming out. As of right now, i'm on the 2nd book, and i'm liking it pretty well. :o)

That's about it for now. I guess i'll write ya' later... Have fun!

Current Mood: apathetic

04:18 pm

Hey guyz. Today's been pretty excitin. I had a quiz in Mus142 (peice of cake), and I have to give a speech this friday (egh). What more has happened?

Oh yeah--I advanced to phase 2 on my diet (which makes me really happy because I don't have to eat eggs in the morning). This morning, I had oatmeal (yum yum), and for lunch I had 2 Jr. Bacon Cheese Burgers w/o the bun. it was yummy too. I think tonight, Laverene is going to be fixin up another yummy south beath diet meal (I'm excited).

Anyway.... I guess that's all for now...

CHECK OUT MY WEBPAGE OR I SHALL EAT YOUR BABIES!!

http://www.angelfire.com/wv2/matanza604/

Current Mood: crazy

01:58 pm - Valentines Day

This Valentines Day was fun fun fun!! Well, Michael and I celebrated our dinner on Saturday; we went to Porfirios (which was extremely yummy!). But yesterday, we exchanged gifts. I got him a tiny red gorilla plush, with a box of chocolates and a card. Guess what he got me.. :o) A fishie :o)

He bought me my first very own fishie--a Betta Fishie. It's a really pretty blue, and I named him Val. He doesn't do very much, but he's still really cute! :o)

Current Mood: okay

11:46 am - My Life as I know it...

Things have been swell for the most part. I've been swamped with homework, but what else is new?? Erica, Chris's girlfriend, emailed me and was trying to be be friends. It was really sweet of her but I also felt a little awkward. I'm not going to go into deep detail about the situation because I've already talked to Chris about it. It wasn't that big of a problem. Everyone thinks I Hate Erica, but hate is such a strong word. What I feel toward Erica isn't hate at all. Now Tessa on the other hand--heh, that was hate.. That was absolute abhorrence; detestation; loathing; odium; revulsion; disgust (I love Word Thesaurus)... Anyway. Yeah, enough of that. :o)

Jay emailed me the other day.. It was nice to talk to a familiar face. I don't have much time to talk to Kristin and girl--they probably have better things to do anyway. but yeah, talking to Jay really did me a great deal of good. I love Michael and everything, but sometimes, I just want to talk to somebody different. I'm sure he know what I mean. :o)

I also miss talking to my old senior lunch table gang (Kristen Ellis, Johnathan (not John) Storage, Isaac Sheets, Jeff Yancey and Brittany Chapman). Mainly, I miss Kristen and Johnathan. They were my best friends and know, I hardly ever talk to them. I doubt Kristen would even wanna' hang out with me --since I'm a little bitter toward God (I won't say hate because he could very easily strike me down for that one). I don't know. She's a great girlie... She wouldn't judge me on those circumstances.... or would she? :o)

Current Mood: calm

11:27 am - My diet..

Yesterday:

Breakfast: 2 Peices of Bacon, some egg (w/ cheese in em'), and 1/2 a cup of V8.

Lunch: A salad w/ ranch dressing, and 2 junior bacon cheese burgers (w/o the bun and w/o the bacon; I'm limited to only 2 peices of bacon of day) from Wendys.

Snack: 15 peices of cashews.

Dinner: A bowl of salad, and three peices of lunch meat (oscar meyer) turkey.

Snack: 15 peices of cashews.

Today:

Breakfast: 2 peices of bacon and some eggs (w/ cheese), and 1/2 a cup of V8.

Lunch: Small bowl of chili and a side salad from wendys.

For Snack, I'm gonna' have 15 peices of cashews

For Dinner, I'll probably have from chicken cooked in some peppers and cheese.

I guess that's all for now... Catch ya' later!

Current Mood: working

11:47 am - South Beath Diet

I started me South Beath Diet today... it's kinda' like the carb diet, but not as strict. Laverene and I are doing it together, which is something I need because I wouldn't be able to do it without some help.

Breakfast: Turkey Bacon and Egg (with cheese inside of it)
Snack: 15 peices of Almonds
Lunch: I'll have Junior Bacon Cheese Burger (w/o the bun) and a side salad
Dinner: Laverene will be fixing something up (knowing her, probably chicken or something... that's ALL she cooks---but it's still really really tastey)


Until then, later!

Current Mood: blah

09:26 pm - So Sleepy....

Hey Guyz... Just writing a short line before I fall asleep... Actually, Michael is online with Stew right now, and after he gets off, we're gonna' watch Monk (I love that show now)... Although I feel like dropping dead asleep, I promised Michael I would wait up for him...:o)

Valentines Day is coming up (Although I haven't had much luck with the holiday, it is still one of my favorite holidays)... Michael doesn't know any ronchy catholics so I don't have to worry about him taking someone else to a restuarant i've been dying to go to nor take another girl to the movie I wanted to see with him (Man, can I hold a grudge or what?). Anyway... Last year, Michael took me to olive garden, bought me this hughe ass box of chocolates (like I need it!), and a cute plush bear.... I wonder what he's got up his sleeve this year.. Whatever it is, i'm sure i'll love it.. :o)

Well, I guess i'm going to end this for now.. I think i'll go in there and bug michael a bit; yeh know, until he gives me a little more attention. :o) (Like I don't get enough already) :o)

Current Mood: sleepy

07:47 am - Thursday

Today's going to be a little boring. I have to go to SWK 203 around 9:30, then head off to work at 11-1. After that, I think i'm suppose to meet up with my mom and check out this house she's looking to rent. Other than that, i'm just gonna' come home and maybe do some homework or something--I don't know what else there is to do.

I was looking through some of Kristin's pictures on Facebook and I started thinking about church and all that. I saw pictures of Brooklynn, and she looks so much like her mom, it's not even funny. I feel kinda' crummy that I'm there, watching her grow up and being apart of the "group". I guess I was a little bit but I was also a burden--a tag along. I'm not going to go to church Just to be accepted; That would be crazy and stupid. I know how church works, and frankly, I guess I don't wanna' be apart of that.

Anyway, I guess I should get going--I need to get ready for class. I'll write later on...

Current Mood: crappy

03:42 pm - stressed out...

Eh, I'm so stressed out. I have so much homework to do, and I've got to help my mom find an apartment. she's gotta' be out by the 5th, and we can't find anywhere. We found this real nice apartment yesterday, but the guy wouldn't go down on the rent. we can only afford like $380 a month (or something like that). My mom doesn't wanna' move to crack town, because she doesn't wanna' get caught up in it. the way it's lookin, though, is that we don't have a choice. it's ironic how welfare is suppose to help you get out of cracktown, but the only houses that are avaiable are in cracktown. I think it's just some government conspircy. if they really "helped" people, then people wouldn't need them. therefore, society would not need social workers. it's all to keep people in the job. *sigh* I'm not worried about myself, because I have Michael. He's helped me SO MUCH to get out of my old life. His family took me in and gave me a place to stay. I probably would have killed myself by now if it were for someone like Michael and his family.

I mean, people who don't know Michael can't really see where i'm coming from. you're probably thinking, "great, she's talking about her boyfriend... what else is new." but you got me all wrong. You would have to meet him. He's nothing like all my old boyfriends. He and I fight all the time, but after 10 minutes, we're loving up on each other again. if I get mad, he knows exactly what to say to make me smile. We're so right for each other. Not to mention, we're best friends. After about 7 months of living together, the romance is mild, but we still talk to each other and cuddle. We have the best friendship ever. He's my bestfriend--what can I say?

Anyway, enough of that jazz...

I guess i'm going to end this for now... I'll write later!

Current Mood: stressed

11:00 am - Wednesday

Today's going to be a little "unfun" (which is nufnu spelled backwards!). Stew is headin' back home on friday around noon so I have to take off work so that I can go up to the airport with michael and his mom. Today, Michael is taking him to WallMart so that he can pick up some things.

Also, my mom got that housing plus or section 8 thing (helps pay for rent), so she can get an apartment or something. Finally, I can have my own room again! Brandon will be moving in with her, which is totally sucky simply because he can afford to live on his own, but he would rather spend all his money on drugs and alcohol, so if he lives with my mom, he can afford to be a junky.

Anyway, I can't wait for something to happen because I am so bored!


Ps: This morning, I saw a guy riding his bike, and out of no where, some car comes around a corner and hits him. Luckily, the guy was alright but the bike lost a tired. the woman was turning way too quickly yet she was making it out to be his fault.

Current Mood: calm

02:31 pm - Wednesday

730- Woke Up
900- Sociology 203
1000- Communications 103
1100- Work
1200- Study Time
100- English 102
200- Work
300- Music 142
400- Work
500- Go to my mom's for a bit

That's basically my day... But when I get home, I'm watching some major American Idol! I'm so excited. :o)
Ps: I changed my Board up a little bit, you should check it out! Join it!

Current Mood: amused

11:58 am - This Past Weekend

Man, this past weekend was fun fun fun. Thursday Michael and I went to a movie (we saw Fun with Dick and Jane), after eating at Unos w/ the fam. Friday, after eating a tasty meal at Jims, we went to the Comedy Club to see John Joseph (who was absolutly hillarious!). Saturday, I worked with Laverene, and then pretty much just loafed. Sunday, we went to the mall and bought some cheap - o clothes and then ran by borders. I got a book-- Brigett Jone's Diarys (I loved the movie and so far, the book is pretty good too). And Yesterday, we went to Scary Creek for some paint balling. I have never done it before and may not do it again for a while. I is so painful and messy! I cried everytime I got hit (especially when I got it in the hand). I am so sore. but it was fun.

Later!

Current Mood: sore

11:16 am

Hey Hey!

No homework so far, just a bit of reading. I have my English Class at 1:00 (who I have with Brittany).. At first, I was all like "great, I have it with Brittany..." (in a sarcastic tone of course), but now... I think it's pretty neat. I mean, as long as a calculator doesn't get involved, I think we'll be fine.

I think that's everything for now... Later!

Current Mood: bored